fragile

in a married couple’s life things can be very very fragile.. birinin kucuk kaprisi digerine cok kotu batabiliyo.. duygusal kisi kinci olana donusebiliyo.. aylarca hic tartismadan kavga etmeden mutlu cift bir haftada iki buyuk kavgayi geride birakabiliyo.. hata nerde, kimde yi arama bulmak mumkun bile degil.. sadece bazen bazi anlarda bazi duygular oyle siddetli olabiliyo ki uzulmemek mumkun degil..bugun dalis yapmaya tek basima gittim ve onu beklemedim. daha dogrusu bastan onun gelmesi icin cok israr etmistim ve bilgisayarinda calismaya devam ettiginde gelmese de olur dedim icimden. cunku cok israr ettim. sonunda gelmeye karar verdi benimle ve bilgisayarini ofkeyle kizginlikla kapatti. ben de gicik oldum bilgiyaraini oyle kapatmasina ve gelme dedim. o gelmek istiyorum birlikte gidelim dedi. ben odamiza tek basima gittim ve donuste ona anahtari uzattim, bu senin anahtarin al dedim. ve tek basima snorkele gittim. bu konu cok buyudu ve cok tatsizlasti.. kafam cok karisik.. kariyer konusu, son gunlerdeki kavgalarimiz.. karisik…

3 kids Retro

Our prime minister advised Turkish women to hae three kids AT LEAST! And he gave this message on March 8th, Women’s Day. He is afraid that in 2030 Turkey will be an old country. He should not worry at all, we are a country of 70 million people and there is no infrastructure, good jobs and quality life opportunities for the young anyway. This kind of messages are ruining decades of consistent family planning efforts. It is hard not to get upset by how irresponsible top politicians can be..

girisimcilik

These days I am obsessed with finding new ideas for starting our own company. I am buying magazines, searching on the web, checking out every restaurant I step in, thinking whether it will be a good concept to franchise and so on.. I am reading about these people who made fortunes and just started with small money. I really would like to know what really took them to where they are. There are so many ideas around us, there are so many seld-made propereous people around and I want to find a smart idea and hit it right there. Is it too much to ask for? I need a good idea, some capital and the luck to pursue it and be successful. On the other hand I dont want to be the loser cafe owner at the corner of the street. I want to start small and just make it big. bigger and bigger..

Lacking

Inspiration for writing new blogs, taking new pictures and learning new languages
Vision for my future
Consistency for being better and better
Patience for excelling the things I already can do

is what I am lacking lately….

Safety

..is what I am lacking.. My mum said the other day that I am wasting my intelligence and my skills because I am doing a well-known regular job. I am abroad, miles and miles away from home. I am itrying to get interviews from politicians and CEO’s and I am working for a small media agency in the UK. I hate to hear that she is disapointed or let me put forward it like this; she is little anxious that when I will have 30 years I will not have a prestigious job. She is worrying about my future, because I was a very successful student always on dean’s list and on scholarships.. Now she is comparing me to those others who were not as successful as me and who have stable jobs and incomes in Turkey. Her fears and worries are contagious because I started to feel the same way.. Although I know that everybody’s dying to have job like mine, a lot of travelling, independence, meeting new people, trying all sorts of foods and going to the most beautiful beaches etc. deep in everybody’s heart there lies a desire to be secure and safe.. Going to the same office, seeing same people, eating almost same things every week, going out to lunch with same coleagues, talking about the same workd routine, gossiping about the boss, such things are what people hate but what people are addicted to. Many people are crazy about independent jpbs but when they have to give up their beloved homes and hit the roads then the difficult part starts.. I am fortunately doing this job with my husband . Otherwise working far away from home, my friends, and especially away from my sister and parents would be really difficult. I like to have this experience, it teaches so much about dealing with people and realising how difficult it is for a Turk in Southeast Asia, I feel like I can survive anywhere..My mum’s concerns should not demoralize me but is it easy? A mum’s bravo always makes happy and if she is not happy it ruins everything.. Let’s see what time will bring.. Indepence vs safe job.. Adventure vs stability… Travelling vs office job.. Meeting cool people vs hanging out with the same folks for many years.. Living the life at the fullest vs making your family happy

Tolerance is what we need…

I have seen this Censorship image while reading a blog on blogger.com and I loved it! These days I am thinking a lot about censorship and freedom of speech. So I just came across with this image in time. Because I am in the Philippines, I am watching TV in English all the time. Before CNN, BBC World were channels that I would just see by chance. But for almost three months now I am watching CNN very often and I am following the presidential elections in USA. I love to watch the debates between Obama and Clinton. I like the way these guys are taking things calmly, and playing it smartly. I am watching Jon Stewart, David Letterman, these guys are making fun of people and nobody is offended. Unlike Turks the people I see on TV are laughing, are not offended and their pride is not hurt. I have come to admit that we Turks get offended easily and our pride is so vulnerable. I watch Sicko, Michael Moore is criticizing American health system so severely and he is alive! A French movie Persepolis is portraying the revolution in Iran and the woman can do this because she lives in France and not in a Muslim country.. The caricaturist guy is taking life threats in Denmark because he hurt the feelings of some others.. I wish people were tolerant towards each other and just have a good sense of humor. Censoring words, feelings, speech, thoughts does us no good..

week 11

Yesterday I watched on TV the commercial of Sony Cybershot: a guy takes cool pictures and chooses one picture every week to represent that week of his life.If he can continue this many years, he will have a picture- biography of his life. I liked the idea so much! It is such a simple idea, and I think the only difficult things is to keep the motivation and do the work. Take a picture a every week and publish it every week on this blog. I am such a wishy-washy type, I always start and usually give up quickly..This time I will be patient and consistent..

Well, the first picture I have chosen is a picture of our living room in Manila, Antel Seaview Towers. We have been working in this room for two months now. And it portrays how we work together..

I will write soon again..